Oh, I'd like to eat about ten pounds of lobster right now.
How do you like how I single handedly crashed the housing market today?
Please don't eat that dog poop.
Don't they know if you say literally, it means it's actually going to happen? Response: Then watch, cuz he's about to blow up.
Oh, you uptight sonuvab*tch, go write another article. [Directed at the tv]
I wish I had a Bloomin Onion.
Is that the guy with the pegleg? [ok, not really. I just thought it fit in]
I love you, Baby. Ni-night.